Strongest Coffee a Texan Can Buy on Amazon

The selling points of Napalm include...Extra Dark. Extra Bold. Extra Strong. If you're face down in a puddle of mud, Napalm will pick you up, dust you off, and send you on the way.

I'm guessing you won't be able to tell the difference between the mud and the coffee.

Shock Coffee claims to be the strongest caffeinated all natural coffee. It's been featured on the Today Show, ABC Nightline, Food Network and more.

Reviews include...5 Stars. Excellent Roast...5 Stars, Good Taste for a Super Charged Day.

Why would you drink something called "Biohazard"? This is something you should runaway from.

They say this coffee will allow you to obtain no stop productivity, enjoy sleepless nights, and partake in all-nighter study sessions. I guess they're targeting college kids.

There is a Caution to this one. It says Insomnia Guaranteed.

I guess this is what you have to drink to slap a bitch. Wow! How is this not a thing?

Great conversation starter though.

"Hey, before you take the money off the dresser, pour me a cup of "Bitch Slap" baby!"

Death Wish also claims to be the "World's Strongest" Coffee.

With a cup of "Death Wish" you can be the best you can be with the clarity and focus that comes with strong coffee.

This sounds like it's in the all the offices of the Pentagon. That's a scary thought. These are the people you hope don't go around asking for a "Death Wish".

Reviews include...5 Stars, "I AM DRINKING THIS COFFEE RIGHT NOW AND I CANNOT STOP SHOUTING AND WRITING IN CAPS LOCKS IT IS SO GOOD AND IT IS SUPER CAFFINATED AND PUNCTUATION IS FOR LOSERS THAT LIKE WEAK COFFEE"

..."5 Stars. Better than Cocaine"